Sunday, February 24, 2013
Well, I've had quite the week wish has slowed my exercising down just a tad. On Thursday night I had a horrible migraine which was so bad I almost went to the ER for it. I don't get migraines often but when I do they are often complicated migraines which have really severe symptoms and often mimic strokes. Fortunately I dealt with it ok. Then Friday evening I was walking through my bedroom when I stepped on a needle. I hardly even flinched as I step on them all the time; needles, pins, what have you (I sew, obviously :b). Anyways, I sat down on my bed to pull it out and the needle was loose in my sock. I looked at the needle and it was broken. Gah! I looked at the ball of the foot and sure enough, the tip of the needle was IN my foot, as in under the skin and no way to get it out. *sigh* so off the the ER. Three hours, one xray, one lidocaine shot, and one minor surgery later, I was needle free. I even took the needle home. It was about 1/4 inch long. OUCH! So, now I am to stay off my foot till it heals. No exercising for a few days. I can do my arms but that's about it.
Moral of the story: don't walk around barefoot and don't leave needles on the floor.
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
A little history.
This is a picture of me in May of 2012. I was 215 pounds. When my husband Dale died in June of 2011 from prostate cancer I was 190 pounds. I coudn't bear to cook at home so the girls and I ate out most of the time. I also wasn't as active anymore. Taking care of a terminally ill loved one takes it's toll on you physically and emotionally. I was stressed, I forgot to eat, I was constantly running around, and I didn't take care of myself at all. I poured everything I had into caring for Dale and our children. During this time I was also trying to take care of my back. I have an L5 herniated disc. We'll go back to my back later.
I've always been at least a little overweight since puberty. I was more active back then and my weight never got over 150. After my dad died in 1993 I was only able to stay in Martial Arts for another year and then I had to quit. My main physical activity was gone. I felt very out of control of my life and I started binging and purging. I became Bulemic. I am still Bulemic. I will never not be Bulemic much like an alcoholic is always an alcoholic. I have triggers and I still cope with them on a daily basis. Add in a 2002 diagnosis of Graves Disease, three children (one of which broke my tailbone during birth), mental illness, and chronic pain and I was/am a mess!
Most people see a fat person and see failure and laziness. They see us eating a donut for breakfast and think, "well no wonder she's fat, she's eating a donut." People assume that fat people don't try; that they don't care. Well these "people" don't see us crying in our pillows, sticking our fingers down our throats to get rid of food, exercise, try the latest diet pill or fad. The dieting industry is huge! So are portions! You go to McDonalds and you can't even order a small sweet tea! They tell you it can only come in a large. Everywhere you go the kids meal portions are as big as adult portions were fifty years ago! Add in GMOs (Genetically modified organisms), high fructose corn syrup, and all kinds of unpronouncable ingredients and we have a recipe for disaster. So I need to remind myself (and you should to) that overweight people are no longer the minority and that there are valid reasons for our struggles that are somewhat beyond our control.
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